Just a cup

Recently we stayed with some friends who don't drink coffee or hot tea every morning.
 *They are, indeed, stronger peeps than we.*

Starting my day that first morning, I asked for a cup and
     my Texas friend offered me the cutest one I'd seen in some time!



She had a few other cups in the cabinet but none as cute as this one.
(I mean, do you see the little flower peeking out inside the handle?!?)
It became "my" cup for the stay and one morning I inquired about where she'd found it.

  "Anthropology......I've had it for years", she said.

As I did my quiet time that morning (while drinking from the cute cup) I was so moved by my friend's kindness that I journal-ed about it.

I know....it's just a cup.. but she only had one of them and it was purchased a long time ago so I was sure it couldn't be replaced if something happened to it. Instead of pushing it to the back of the cabinet while company was there, to ensure that nothing would happen to it, she brought it out and offered it to me to use.

I was very careful with it and that simple act of kindness opened an entire chasm of gratitude for me...

I began to journal and thank God for the countless kindnesses that He's poured out over our family during this time of transition.

Kindness is..
  ..sharing.
  ..making room for more people (and stuff) when you've got just enough space for your own.
  ..giving up a vehicle so someone else can have wheels.
  ..moving your kiddos into your room so your guests can spread out.
  ..taking your friend for a spontaneous nail appointment.
  ..staying up way past your bedtime to watch movies and play games with friends you haven't seen in a while.
  ..sending a message to let your people know they are thought of and prayed over.
  ..offering grace.
  ..listening without trying to fix things. 
  ..embracing with a big ole hug.
  ..sharing the ministry of indoor soccer.
  ..grocery shopping for another family plus yours.
  ..cooking for 6 extra people.
  ..taking a family to visit your church and then treating the guys to a pro soccer event.
  ..mailing little notes and checks and gifts out of the blue.
  ..lending your camera when your friend forgets hers.
  ..making dips and patio drinks and settling in for long conversations.
  ..teaching new games and playing old ones together.
  ..driving 5.5 hours to meet long distance friends and then taking them to a ballgame.
  ..buying extra laundry detergent.
  ..meeting your pal on your only day off.
  ..waiting when your guests are running late.
  ..treating a big family to a nice meal out.
  ..giving your best instead of just the 'good enough'.

The list could go on and on and on. 

As you can imagine, our current position of beginning again has been extremely humbling but in our need, we've seen [firsthand] the true picture of the church as described in Acts. 

"No one claimed that any of his possessions was his own, 

but they shared everything they had."

Acts 4:32

We ventured to the States almost 10 months ago with expectations. 
Expectations that changed as "real" life happened. 
Expectations that were, both, met and unmet.

Expectations that proved: 

Wandering (even with a purpose), leaves a person (or 6 people) very vulnerable.

Many have put action to their words and have given--over and beyond simple means--but here's the thing that remains hard for me..

     ..more often than not, I've got to admit my need in order to receive. 

And needing people is risky.

I'm a risk-taker by nature but I don't like needing people.
I'd rather be self-sufficient. I'd rather trust myself than trust someone who might not be there at the time I need them most. If you've ever needed someone who didn't come through for one reason or another, you know what I mean.

I like making sure it's done and done right. I like to control the outcome as much as possible so I tend to rationalize that it's easier not to need people (or God). When others don't help shoulder a load, or worse..don't even show up..
when we're wounded after trust is broken,
it hurts.

When a friend falls down themselves and can't spare a hand,
needing people can get messy.
But self-sufficient thinking is dangerous. To think we don't need others is a lie.

God created us as relational beings. We need Him and we need each other.
From the moment God made me, He knew that I would need others and He also knew that I would try to do things on my own. In this season, I am a student who's learning that, "Two are better than one..."(Ecclesiastes 4:9) on some pretty deep levels.


Being dependent on others is hard and often icky but we learn together. We grow together. We can "get by" alone, but we really thrive when we are together.

I've already admitted that I don't like needing people but I also admit that I have to choose.
   --->Risk and reap great rewards or play it safe (and lonely) and bear the weight alone.

None of the kindnesses listed above would have been ours to receive if we hadn't agreed to need.

Maybe you're like me and you'd say it's easier to give graciously than to receive graciously but y'all, we've got to take note of the cups that remind us that the blessings outweigh the risk.

Venture out and show some kindness today BUT let someone show you a little bit, as well.



P.S. In spite of my ever-growing disdain for luggage and bags, I unpacked last week and guess what my friend had secretly wrapped and placed in one?!?

"Money is but one

venue for GENEROSITY.

KINDNESS is an even more

valuable currency."

-Alan Cohen

Yes!

You guys - THANK YOU!!!

So many of you have been praying and have done an amazing job of keeping in touch and loving us across miles and miles and miles.

A little over a week ago, our crew piled into my dad's truck in pursuit of a vehicle but not before previously calling about many others, stopping to see several possibilities, and driving several miles to check out some clunkers and some way-out-of-our-price-range beauts.

We prayed (and begged) til we were blue and we were in high hopes that we'd finally found "the one". We drove about 50 miles to a dealership that had said vehicle and then we went through the gamut. We chatted with the sales guy and then loaded into the vehicle and took it for a spin.

We (kids included) started listing the visible stuff that was wrong and pulled over to check under the hood. We began the "well, we could probably get this fixed for this price but is that other issue worth what it's going to cost to fix it?" banter.

As we weighed the options we drove back to the dealership not quite sold on it being "the one". Feeling great disappointment and defeat again, we were just about to leave when John noticed a fresh find.

As we were talking to the sales guy another family was buying a new car and trading in their old one. An old one that was the exact size we were looking for and about the same year we had been looking for, too. When John spotted it he asked if it was available.

Sure enough, it was in fact available. We looked it over and waited on a price (since it wasn't in the system yet) and after a few minutes were elated to find out it just might be what we had been praying for. We reloaded the family and tested that baby out.

Y'all...... we drove away with that vehicle that day!
God is so good. He promises to deliver. When we are tempted to give up, He's often waiting with "the one".

Thanks for praying for us - please DON'T STOP!
We've still got a long road ahead.

           But when the enemy screams, "YOU CAN'T",
                remind him that with the right directions.......

Badump, bump....the cheese here is free folks but the lessons are not!


 

Update

As most of you know, its been 4 years since we committed to leap out of our "knowns" and jump into the "unknowns" of full-time work in Haiti. We've been stretched beyond what we argued we could stand but we've also been blessed more abundantly than we ever dreamed.

Prayers were answered all along the way!  

After 2 years of praying through some pretty hard transitions, we returned to Mississippi last year as an excited, yet exhausted, family of 6 on July 1st for furlough.  We were eager to unwind with family, regroup, and prepare to return to Haiti in January. We prayed for direction and provision for the next step as we traveled and shared about our work. 

So many of you have continued to lift us up through each and every challenge. You're simply amazing! 

At the end of December, 4 of our 6 traveled back to Haiti. Caleb and I returned to Mississippi the middle of January but John stayed and worked with our Heartline Ministries family in Port-au-Prince and Cabila was able to go and visit with some extended family and friends from his 'hometown'. Being apart was really hard as we continued to pray for direction. 

Last month I wrote about delays and travel and disappointment and prayers and waiting and All These Aspects. Praise the Lord, we are all together again but today I write with a heavy heart.

We believe that our family needs to be together wherever we are serving...that's always been our plan. But the thing that's currently leveling me is the plan to return to the States full-time. It's not a decision we've taken lightly but it is a decision that John and I feel God has led us to. The last 8 months have been brutal as we've mapped out what the "next" is supposed to look like. 

We aren't shutting the door on Haiti but we agree that making plans where we have more opportunity to do what's best for our family unit is here right now. My mind knows this but my heart has yet to embrace it. My heart is in Haiti. I don't want to start over here. 

I'm struggling and while I know it's a great risk to put my raw feelings out here in the vast world of social media, I need to ask for your prayers as we begin this process of starting over. 

 

If you are a praying person, would you pray for us?  

This very real, 'say goodbye to where you've been and tell your heart to beat again' kind of feat is upon us.  Will you pray for supernatural relief and provision as we look for employment, vehicles and the right place to relocate and serve?

Another beginning... getting back up...starting over... Oh God - as I type the words I shake...
     It's going to require strength I'm not sure I have.


Clinging to this: "When two of you get together on anything at all on earth and make a prayer of it, My Father in heaven goes into action. And when two or three of you are together because of Me, you can be sure that I'll be there." 

-Matthew 18: 19-20