That ''w" word...

Lately, Kylie has been super interested in going to the roof to watch the sun go down each day.  I'm not sure if it's for the 'rooftop adventure', the little break away from the crazy, or if she really does enjoy watching the sun go down but one day last week she asked me if we could get up early to watch the sun... ummm... rise.  

I rarely ever get up before an alarm goes off and more often than not, I snooze well after the alarm has alarmed.  

I'm a night owl.  

Not an early-morning-chipper-sunrise-watcher type person.

But the moments I have with our Kylie, just the 2 of us, are few and far between so I said if she actually got up (cause she has been known to be the latest riser of our 4 littles) then I would get up and go with her.  

Don't judge me but I totally banked on the fact that when she was nudged in the dark that she would roll over and grunt at me and drift back into slumber, allowing me to do the same.  

Yeh, so when I got up and nudged her on the bunk above me, telling her it was almost 6 a.m., she bounced up like a real live Tigger.

I grabbed my camera because, well, there would be a sunrise and I should capture that and off we went.

But I was captured instead.

Watching her wait for the sun to rise was as much a delight to me as actually seeing the anticipated sun rise.

And it hit me... 

    as I watched my daughter,  I saw myself.

       Waiting...not just for a sunrise but for so much more.

The past year has been hard...

And many times I've been ready to gear up and go, 

but God has said 'wait'.  

SO MANY stinkin' times He has said 'wait'!!

The fog was so thick and seemed to be holding back that thing that we had gotten up so early to see and I began to think that the morning we chose to get up might have been a 'dud'.  

And then there in the middle of my doubts, it was happening... 

The sun was in fact rising...and our waiting was not in vain.  

I've never known waiting to be easy at any stage in life but I have found that waiting is the best place to be when that's what we hear from the One who makes the sun rise.

And also this...

    there is so much beauty in the waiting...

        if we will trust Him.

Whatever you are waiting for... take note of the things around you that beckon thanks and rest in knowing that He has NOT EVER ONCE  forgotten you in the 'wait'. 

Like a wide-winged eagle waiting for a thermal current to carry it heavenward, you must stay in God's presence with your heart attuned to Him.  Do you have duties and demands?  Yes, but none as important as this.  Why?  Because you understand that if you don't get into God's presence and stay there until He refreshes and restores you, you won't make it. ~Word For You Today

"Those who wait upon God get fresh strength." 

Isaiah 40:31

2.16.96

Though we make plans, God orders our steps...

19 years ago today John and I were comparing notes before heading back to lead small group discussions during a DNow weekend in Starkville, MS.  (GO Dawgs!)  We'd met about 10 months prior and dated for about 4 of those months...  2 on, 6 off, 2 on.  That's another story for another time.

(smiles)

A friend of ours, also one of John's roommates at the time, was a youth pastor and asked us to help facilitate that weekend.  As we talked about the material, we discussed our own thoughts regarding the topic and shared past experiences where we'd personally seen God work.

As we were wrapping up our discussion, John started grinning all over himself and shifting in his seat.  I asked him what was going on but he hesitated - just kept smiling.  I kept questioning what in the world was going on, wondering if I had said something that spurred this mystery.  He said that if he told me that I'd think he was crazy.

And then he said it...

"I think you are the one...that I'm supposed to spend the rest of my life with..."      

Without missing a beat I assured him that I didn't think he was crazy because I had been thinking the same thing!

At that point, we were both cheesy grinning all over ourselves and I thought my heart would beat right out of my chest.  We called our friend aside and told him that we wouldn't be there for the Sunday morning finalé and after the evening session we packed the car and headed to my parents, about 45 minutes away.

When we arrived, John asked to speak to my dad.  Adrenaline was at an all-time high and I bit my lip waiting for John and Daddy to finish their chat.  We received the blessing and a celebration erupted- despite the fact that my mom felt it necessary to warn John that he had not yet seen my real temper!
(details, details...)

We visited for a bit and then got back in the car to tackle the 80+ miles between us & John's parents.  It was late and I'm pretty sure we woke them up but they, too, were elated over our news!  After receiving our 2nd parental blessing, we daydreamed... and planned.

This August will mark 19 years of marriage...
    19 years of our planning under His ordering...

Plans and orders that have included loss and gain..death and life..joy and sorrow..

moves and mountains..purpose and provision..beauty and ashes..

faith and fear..kids and commitments.

Things haven't always gone as we had planned.  God has shaped us and broken us and mended us only to break us again and again for our good.  But through it ALL I praise God for orchestrating our steps that day and today.

"We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps."

Proverbs 16:9