Saturday, December 15, 2012

Seeking a heart like HIS...

It's been a while...  For me personally, I admit that when I am hurting I tend to retreat.  We, as a family, have pulled back quite a bit lately to evaluate not only what's happening around us but to study what our own responses, reactions and responsibilities are or need to be.

Although our relationship with Christ is personal, for sure, we don't feel that we have a right to keep it private and when we launched this blog we agreed to go public with our current journey in particular.
Today's post is NOT an attempt to showcase our side verses another side but a simple, honest outpouring of our hearts, our struggles and a request for continued prayer.

This time of year is CRAZY stressful for everyone!  I mean aside from the stresses of packing, living out of crates, planning appropriate good-byes along with some 'see-you-laters' and preparing emotionally, physically and mentally for moving to an unknown country while attending end of semester school functions, shopping for the perfect gifts and working to squeeze in needed time with family and friends ALL of us feel the stresses of December in some form or fashion as we get ready for the holidays.  Whatever December looks like for you, I feel certain you are experiencing stress, too.  If not, awesome...please share your insight in the comments area below! :)

In the midst of our stresses, we've been guilty of trying to carry some burdens that are out of our control.  It's hard not to fight against the things that bring us pain.  It's hard not to war against that which is uncomfortable.   It's hard not to become bitter when we continue to be inconvenienced with issues that are left unattended to.  It's hard not to get aggravated when ultimatums are made.  While we know that we have to live each day as it comes, not dwelling on what has been done and not fearing what is to come... honestly, some days that just doesn't add up to all it's supposed to.  When we face betrayal, we react with less than a welcome for more.  When we are attacked, we shy away from sources delivering the blows.  When we are deceived, we rarely embrace those involved as friends.

BUT...

We are learning that though some situations cut to the very core of our being, they are creating good whether in us or another and that, we can't argue with.  "The Lord will do what is good in His sight.", 1 Chronicles 19:13.  Though disappointed, we are experiencing a peace that is nothing like the "peace" this world advertises.  Though we may cry out in frustration as Job did in chapter 3, "I have no peace, no quietness; I have no rest, but only turmoil", we are comforted with this from John 14:27, "I am leaving you with a gift-peace of mind and heart.  And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give.  So don't be troubled or afraid."  We believe that God can be trusted to carry not only the things that burden us but to carry us, as well.  Matthew 11:28 says, "Come to me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."

We have a choice... when we are dealing with people who are too tired to find the right words or too busy to be bothered with making some wrongs, right - we can let our pain, anger and frustrations become bitterness, spitefulness, and ill-attempts to return evil for evil or we can do the right thing and allow God to transform our very real yucky, icky feelings into compassion beyond what we are capable of distributing on our own.  At this point, we are pleading with God that justice be issued regarding some issues we are dealing with but at the same time we are also pleading for His perfect dose of mercy and grace and forgiveness to permeate our lives so that it overflows, allowing us to issue the same.  

We know we are not alone in this journey, regardless of what our enemy tries to portray.  We are honored to know that several of you have partnered with us around the world to lift us up on this journey and we are never more grateful than now for your unselfish gift of intercessory prayer!

So, with 25 days remaining until we load that plane, we praise God for you!  We praise Him for giving us the strength we need to persevere and we look forward to the blessings that await us.  Every time we ask, we receive.  It may not be the way we want, as quickly as we want or even WHAT we want but we will keep believing that we are receiving exactly what we need in full so that we can be who we were created to be.

"God can pour on the blessings in astonishing ways so that you're ready for anything and everything, more than just ready to do what needs to be done.  As one psalmist puts it, 
    'He throws caution to the winds, giving to the needy in reckless abandon. 
        His right-living, right-giving ways never run out, never wear out.'
This most generous God who gives seed to the farmer that becomes bread for your meals is more than extravagant with you.  He gives you something you can then give away, which grows into full-formed lives, robust in God, wealthy in every way, so that you can be generous in every way, producing with us great praise to God."  2 Corinthians 9:8-11 (MSG) 

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

20 questions...

When I pray, “God, break my heart for what breaks yours”, do I mean it when He really breaks my heart?

Have you ever benefited from someone else’s pain?

Has your pain ever benefited someone else?

How do you feel about being used, whether it’s for good or not?

How many times have I cried out for God to take an issue only to grab it back and try to make sense of it myself?

Does anyone else feel like you’re trying to hear the whispers of God above the shouting of man?

Do I trust that I am right where I am supposed to be regardless of the trials?

Am I willing to go through the valley instead of looking for ways around it?

Do I believe that less of Me and more of Him is where I really find true self-esteem?

Have I learned to be content no matter my circumstances and surroundings?

Am I able to extend the very grace that I wish to have extended to me?

When I’m ready to cave, do I remember the blessing I have asked for?

Am I placing myself in the higher position if I should dare to tell God that He’s not allowed to ‘go there’?

Do I believe I am alone in my trials?

Could it be that I don’t really trust that He has the best plan if I keep trying to go around the obstacle He’s asked me to go through?

Is it possible to have more than I need when I come to the end of me?

Does He love me in spite of my shortcomings?

Do I believe the words when I sing that His “grace is enough”?

Is He my ‘Everything’?  

If not, am I ready for Him to be?

While my mind swirls with these questions and so many more lately, there's no question about the fact that God uses music/lyrics to speak to me.  This morning I am reminded of an older song:

     The pathway is broken and the signs are unclear.  
     And I don't know the reason why You brought me here.
     But just because You love me the way that You do,
     I'm gonna walk through the valley if You want me to.

     Cause I'm not who I was when I took my first step
     And I'm clinging to the promise --You're not through with me yet.
     So if all of these trials bring me closer to You,
     then I WILL go through the fire if you want me to.

     It may not be the way I would have chosen. 
     Well, You lead me through a world that's not my home.
     But You never said it would be easy.
     You only said I'll never go alone.

     So when the whole world turns against me and I'm all by myself
     And I can't hear You answer my cries for help,
     I'll remember the suffering Your love put YOU through
     And I will go through the valley if You want me to.

Today, I don't feel as though I am alone but over the last month I've fought those feelings for sure.  Maybe whatever you are going through has left you feeling like you are alone, too.  1 Peter 5:6-9 says, "Humble yourselves under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings." 
Everyone has a cross to bear--everyone has a story--everyone has wounds that need healing.  I am not alone and neither are you. Sometimes that might be the only thing we can give thanks for but it's definitely a start.    

It's hard to see clearly in the middle of difficult, painful times but thankfully God doesn't leave us in the 'fog'.  When we seek God, we find Him (Deut 4:29, I Chr 28:9) and when we praise Him regardless of the situation, we gain clarity and understanding.  This is why He tells us to give thanks in all circumstances (Eph 5:20).  "Thankfulness takes the sting out of adversity.  There is an element of mystery in this transaction: You give Me thanks (regardless of your feelings), and I give you Joy (regardless of your circumstances).  This is a spiritual act of obedience-at times, blind obedience.  To people who don't know Me intimately, it can seem irrational and even impossible to thank Me for heartrending hardships.  Nonetheless, those who obey Me in this way are invariably blessed, even though difficulties may remain. Thankfulness opens your heart to My Presence and your mind to My thoughts. You may still be in the same place, with the same set of circumstances, but it is as if a light has been switched on, enabling you to see from My perspective.  It is the Light of My Presence that removes the sting from adversity." (from Sarah Young in Jesus Calling)

If you read Praise & Petitions a couple of weeks ago then you may remember me quoting this, "If you are going to be used by God, He will take you through a number of experiences that are not meant for you personally at all.  They are designed to make you useful in His hands, and to enable you to understand what takes place in the lives of others." No one enjoys being used...really...whether it's for the betterment of ourselves or someone else.  Being used is not comfortable but when I gave my life to Christ I agreed with my mouth that I no longer belong to myself and as I walk this commitment out, I acknowledge that my actions and my life have to mirror my words.  Being used is part of laying down my life for the good of my God.  I can tell Him I'm available and I can ask Him to use me but when He begins the "plan of action" I tend to want to argue that He should intervene and make things easier for me and mine.  This way of thinking is about me and not about God at all.  

As Jennifer Rothschild pointed out in a devotional today, "When a big "I" is the center of our thoughts and feelings, we truly are miserable!  Perhaps that's because "I" is also in the center of pride and sin.  Jesus said in John 12:24 that, "...unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone."  Alone is a miserable place to be.  "But," Christ continued, "if it dies, it bears much fruit." The principle is this: when it is all about us, we are like the seed that is unwilling to die.  Consequently, we find ourselves alone in the prison of our own self-awareness.  But, when we are willing to turn our big "I" into a little "I", we are then ready to experience real life, satisfying life."

God's way of dealing with things that happen may seem like the strangest way but I am learning the beauty of contentment in the midst of the ashes.  Have I arrived at complete contentment?  No, but I am striving.  I am on the path and every step of the way God is proving He is trustworthy and that His love is unfailing (Ps 107:8,9,15,16,21,31).  

While my faith is being stretched, I take joy in knowing I don't have to take leaps, just one step at a time.  Martin Luther King, Jr. said, "Take the first step in faith.  You don't have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step." 


        **God, when I am tempted to believe that your grace is not enough, may I be reminded that all of you is indeed enough for all of me (2 Cor 12:9)!  When I am wronged and want to scream and yell in the midst of unfairness, I will claim your promises that You are known by YOUR justice (Ps 10:16).  When I am tempted to take situations into my own hands desiring justice, continue to remind me that you are working ALL things for my good, even what man may mean as harm (Rom 8:28).  I love you and I thank you for not giving up on me, ever!  Less of me... more of you... (John 3:30)

Thursday, November 15, 2012

Praises & petitions..

Pastor Frank called yesterday saying that our Montero Sport had still not been released from Customs in Haiti.  He felt like it would be within the day or so, so I thought I'd update you as to what has happened regarding that...
John was told to expect taxes for release to be around $1200-1600.  Pastor Frank stayed behind in Haiti to ensure the release after John returned to MS.  He called the beginning of this week and said that they quoted him $6750 but Pastor was able to get the cost down to $2730 + some miscellaneous fees totaling about $3000 in all.  This is twice what we expected but then half of what they initially stated so we are grateful!!!
We are happy to say that after the week of ups and downs with that, we got another call today & the truck was released and is now in Camp Coq!

Praise the LORD!!!

We would like to ask you to continue to pray with us about a couple of other things, as well.

The next pressing need is for a water well.  John talked with several people about the possibility of hiring a crew to dig a well in Camp Coq for the Mission House so that there would be clean water and the last estimated quote he received was $10,012.  We know that costs could, however, vary depending on drill conditions.  We also know that this is a whole lot of money and we are continuing to pray that the money will be provided to make this possible so that we have safe water.  If you feel led, please pray for this, as well.  

Please also pray for our family as we are experiencing more and more attacks from the enemy the closer it gets to our departure time.  We never expected our prep time to be easy but we continue be amazed (not in a good way) at how things around us appear to be getting worse as time goes on.  We have become really guarded and are treading lightly to discern who is trustworthy and who proves to be otherwise.  We've lost great respect for some and we've had to separate ourselves all together from others.

While our hearts are SCREAMING "enough already" we know who holds our future days, our future hours, our future minutes.  We will keep our faith in the ONE who has already claimed the victory for His glory, not ours.  

Oswald Chambers said this in My Utmost for His Highest:
"If you are going to be used by God, He will take you through a number of experiences that are not meant for you personally at all.  They are designed to make you useful in His hands, and to enable you to understand what takes place in the lives of others.  
The sufferings of Christ were not those of ordinary people. He suffered "according to the will of God" (1 Peter 4:19), having a different point of view of suffering from ours. It is only through our relationship with Jesus Christ that we can understand what God is after in His dealings with us.  When it comes to suffering, it is part of our Christian culture to want to know God's purpose beforehand.  People have sought to carry out God's orders through a shortcut of their own. 
Are we prepared for God to stamp out our personal ambitions? Are we prepared for God to destroy our individual decisions by supernaturally transforming them?  It will mean not knowing why God is taking us that way, because knowing would make us spiritually proud.
We never realize at the time what God is putting us through-we go through it more or less without understanding.  Then suddenly we come to a place of enlightenment, and realize-"God has strengthened me and I didn't even know it!"

If the will of God means a hard and difficult time for you, go through it.  God chose the test for Abraham, and Abraham neither delayed nor protested, but steadily obeyed.  
...by going through the trial you learn to know God better.  God is working in us to reach His highest goals until His purpose and our purpose become one."

Oh, how we want to be submissive to His plans.  When we are tempted to pull back, we are learning to press in even harder.  We do not consider your prayers a small gift but a HUGE gift and part of the very reason we are able to keep going every single day!  PLEASE keep offering them up!!!
We trust that God is most definitely drawing us closer to Him with each passing day but we also admit that the human relationship betrayals and disappointments sure do hurt.  

A sweet couple sent us a card this past week that was very encouraging in the midst of where we are right now.  It was based on Psalm 40:3 that says, "He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God.  Many will see and fear and put their trust in the Lord."  In the card they referenced a devotional they read saying, "You are going to sing this song-the song of thanksgiving, comfort, glory and victory. As you sing it others will be caught up in it and they too will sing and you will be filling the world with song. May God bless you in this great and wonderful venture for Christ."

"WE ARE HARD PRESSED ON EVERY SIDE, BUT NOT CRUSHED; PERPLEXED BUT NOT IN DESPAIR; PERSECUTED, BUT NOT ABANDONED; STRUCK DOWN BUT NOT DESTROYED."
2 Corinthians  4:8-9

Monday, November 12, 2012

Forever loved, never forgotten…

Not an issue I thought we were going to have to deal with…  I thought she was fine… she was the one I worried about the least…  not because I didn’t love her but because she was fine and her future seemed secure… she was happy… she was pampered… she was… fine…

She loved my mom and my mom loved her so it seemed like a no-brainer that as we prepared to leave for Haiti that Sophie would go and live with her “grandparents”, Mammaw & Jolly…

In the attempt to make a smooth transition, we opted for Sophie to go home with my parents at the end of August.  I knew that I wouldn’t be able to part with all of our pets at once so I planned to stagger the goodbyes.  It seemed like the right thing to do.  

Every time Mammaw and Jolly came to visit, all the kids got excited- even the furry ones!!!  We have joked for years that Sophie was ‘Mom’s dog’ because she immediately attached herself to Mammaw as soon as she walked in the door here.  There were many tears shed but I knew we’d all be ok because we knew that Sophie was going to be happy there. 


I got the news early this morning that Sophie passed away during the night last night.  She died from kidney failure.  She would’ve been 5 at the first of the year so we know it wasn’t due to age.  The best we can tell, according to the vet that took care of her, is that she had a bacterial infection that progressed and she went into kidney failure.   

February would have been 5 years since we rescued Sophie.  

My heart hurts knowing she is gone for good.  

My heart hurts for my Mom as I know she loved this dog as I did and I know they had a special bond.
  
My heart hurts as I think about how I will tell our children that she's gone and my heart is in turmoil -once again- regarding the future of our 3 remaining furry kids once we depart in January. 

`````God, how can I proceed with the goodbyes???  It’s in You and only You that this will be possible…`````

I went through a period of distancing myself from my pets hoping that it would help in the separation that is to come.  It hurt to hold them close knowing the days were numbered so I kept busy and did just what had to be done… fed them, let them out, let them in, bathed them, etc, etc, etc.  This didn’t last long because I couldn’t ignore the eyes, the purrs, the barks, etc… I gave in and I resolved to make the most of every day that I have left with them.  I still can't bring myself to make the "announcement" that I need homes for my babies... not that I am oblivious to the fact that time is running out but because I physically haven't been able to bring myself to face the "interviewing" process.  I don't want to find homes for them because I don't want their homes to be anywhere but where they are... with me...  facing this death and this shock is hard.  I KNOW God's plans are better, his ways are better ALL THE TIME as I stated in last week's posts...  but it doesn't mean they are easy to digest all the time.  


Please pray today for our family, both immediate and extended as we grieve this loss and seek to embrace the losses that are imminent.  

I do not regret our decision to let Sophie go and be with my Mom & Dad.  I know she had a fabulous last 2 months being pampered and loved on there!  I do hate that they had to be the ones to see her go downhill this past week but God is faithful.  I thank God for these parents who walk beside us through the good and the bad... who love with us and grieve with us, all the while trusting and leaning on the fact that God is working the best for each of us!

Just before talking with the vet this morning and receiving the news, I saw this...

I feel much like this torn leaf but I continue to be amazed at His presence wherever I am and His constant reminders that He loves me!  Oh, how He loves me and how He is drawing me closer to Him more and more everyday.


Thursday, November 8, 2012

and... (2)

I talked to John tonight!  They were up until 3am this morning unloading the trucks last night but I am pleased to let you know that after another really looooooooong day today, they were able to install ALL of the solar panels and the electrical 'thingy-ma-bobs' for that. Yes, ALL of them!  Isn't that great?!?!?

Yay, God!  

Hallelujah!!!
  
What a mighty God we serve!!!  

Yippee ki-aaaaaaaaaaaaa!

I trust they are resting now as he was headed to clean up and then go to bed when he called earlier.  He said after all that down time of waiting they 'hit the ground running' and I praise God they were able to accomplish so much in such little time.  I am praying that He will multiply their hours of sleep tonight.  They have a long trip back to Port-au-Prince tomorrow and will fly out on Saturday. 

I am so glad he will be home in 48 hours!  I know Amanda is, too!!! ;)

Thank you for your prayers, again!  Don't stop, please!!!  And remember to add praises as you petition on our behalf.  Thank you, thank you!!!

We love you! 

and...

...our things were released yesterday and the guys were making their way to Camp Coq last night to deliver them!!!

Thanking and praising God, here, for what's taking place there!!!

When I talked to John last night, they were making the trip back to CC after being in Cap Haitien all day.  They were going to unload last night despite the hour.  I know they have to be exhausted!  These next 2 days will be full to say the least but we are grateful for the release of our items.  :)

Please pray for strength for John and for Sean and that today will be productive and that they will experience little to no complications when working.  Pray also for those helping, that all will work together well and that there will be no injuries or accidents.

No word on the Montero yet so we're still praying all goes smoothly with that.  I trust we will be equally as excited with how God works out each detail regarding the release and registration of that.

While I am quite aware that our enemy is working overtime to keep my focus on things around us that seek to hinder, I will praise God today for all that is good!  I will focus on promises fulfilled by our God and I will praise Him because His ways are not our ways but better (Isa 55:8)!  

Thank you for continuing to pray regarding all the details!

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Container news..

I just talked to John a little bit ago.  Pastor Frank arrived in Camp Coq last night with the intent to try and help expedite things this week. They spent the day in Cap Haitien today.  John was able to confirm that our things did make it to Cap Haitien and all was transferred to another container today.

We were able to pay a flat fee for the container thanks to God (and Pastor Frank for having connections)!  The Customs' officials are in the process of determining the tax charges and we are hoping all will be released tomorrow.  My understanding is that anything over the amount we paid will be covered by the people John dealt with (via Pastor Frank).  Yay!!!  Thank you, God!!!

At this point, please continue to pray for John and Sean as they will go back to Cap Haitien tomorrow to make arrangements for our Montero Sport to be released, as well.  I didn't understand all of the process but I continue to rest in knowing God is still in control and all is going just as He has purposed.  :)

John sounded really tired so I'm praying they will be able to get some rest tonight before heading back tomorrow.  The drive/ride is anything but smooth and he said they felt every bit of the ride after dealing with all of this today.

Please pray that their remaining 3 1/2 days in Haiti will be productive and peaceful.  Pray for all the relationships at hand.

Thank you!!!

Promises, promises...

It’s easy for me to get upset with someone who makes promises they don’t keep – especially if it’s’ a repeat situation.  I automatically want to move them to my mental “box” of people I can’t trust. 

What about you? 

Recently I felt convicted when thinking about this…  

Although I don’t do it intentionally I know I, too, am guilty of making promises I don’t keep.  It may be a situation where I have great intentions and never get around to following through or I may just honestly forget that I made the promise at all.  It could be something as simple as one of our children asking me to do something and me saying, “in a few minutes” and then never getting around to doing it due to the other ‘somethings’ I have going on at the same time or it might be something more in depth.  I do know that forgetting about things happens more and more frequently as our family has grown!  :~/

Either way, I am convicted about how harshly I might judge someone else’s actions that when compared with my own seem less severe. 

During our preparation to move to Haiti over this last year, we’ve been blown away by people’s generosity and dedication to our family and our journey but we’ve also been severely disappointed by several people, too.  I found myself ‘sizing them up’ and 'marking them with a scarlet letter' in my mind (and even in my heart) until I was reminded that since we’re all human and we operate in the flesh this side of heaven, that we will continue to experience disappointment and that we will disappoint, too, because we are all flawed. 

There’s not one person on earth that can promise to always follow through with their promises every time.  Even those who love us most, those who we treasure most, those who would never want to hurt us are incapable of the task of never letting us down.  While this is disheartening, we can be encouraged today because there is One who we CAN trust to keep His promise every time! 

Maybe you know Christ personally but maybe you don’t.  Maybe you don’t trust God because you feel that He has let you down already.  Maybe you tried walking with Him during part of your life and things didn’t go the way you envisioned so you parted ways.  I get it… I really do... but today I want to challenge you to try again. 

It’s not easy but it’s rewarding because I’m not left with that sinking feeling that I get when I’ve trusted someone and given them one more time to prove they are worthy of my trust only to be let down again.  God doesn’t promise to do things the way I want Him to but I’m learning to trust that He’s the only One who is worthy of being trusted through every curve, every hill, every mountain, every valley, every bump, every pot-hole, every loop hole, every cliff, every everything. 

Many times I think we set ourselves up for failure before we begin our walk with God because we simply confuse our position with His.  We act like the Creator of our own lives when really we are the created.  Who could be better at knowing what’s really best for our lives than the One who created us?  A blog I occasionally read goes more in depth on this here:  Which map are you using?

While I am learning to depend on God more each day, I am recalling the times and places where He has proved Himself to me personally and I’m clinging to these words:

“People with their minds set on you, you keep completely whole, steady on their feet, because they keep at it and don’t quit.  Depend on God and keep at it because in the LORD God you have a sure thing.”
Isaiah 26:3-4

“Keep company with God, get in on the best.  Open up before God, keep nothing back; He’ll do whatever needs to be done: He’ll validate your life in the clear light of day and stamp you with approval.. Quiet down before God, be prayerful before Him. Don’t bother with those who climb the ladder, who elbow their way to the top. Bridle your anger, trash your wrath, cool your pipes – it only makes things worse.” Psalm 37:5-8

“If your child asks for bread, do you trick him with sawdust? If he asks for fish, do you scare him with a live snake on his plate? As bad as you are, you wouldn’t think of such a thing. You’re at least decent to your own children. So don’t you think the God who conceived you in love will be even better?
Matthew 7:9-11,

“I don’t leave you the way you’re used to being left—feeling abandoned, bereft. So don’t be upset. Don’t be distraught.
John 14:27

“Don’t fuss about what’s on the table at mealtimes or if the clothes in your closet are in fashion. There is far more to your inner life than the food you put in your stomach, more to your outer appearance than the clothes you hang on your body. Look at the ravens, free and unfettered, not tied down to a job description, carefree in the care of God. And you count far more.
Luke 12:22-24

“This most generous God who gives seed to the farmer that becomes bread for your meals is more than extravagant with you.” 
2 Cor 9:10  

(All above verses from The Message version)

Sunday, November 4, 2012

9 days, 7 days, 65 days....

9 days since John left...

7 days since he is supposed to be home...

65 days til the target moving/leaving Mississippi day...

God says, "I make known the end from the beginning...My purpose will stand." Isaiah 46:10

"You are going to succeed because God has already determined your destiny.  Before God establishes the procedure, He decides the purpose.  When a builder is confused he refers back to the blueprint and checks with the architect.  God is the architect and builder of your life.  He never gets confused about what He's planned or how it's to be built.  When He builds something, it's built for maximum efficiency and optimal performance.  We think, 'Lord, why are You holding me back while others get to go forward? Why is it taking so long for my breakthrough to come?'  God responds, 'What does the blueprint say?' God is building a solid foundation under you so that you'll be able to handle the pressures that accompany His blessing, and go through the storms of life without being moved or shaken.  Anything that's made well is made slowly.  Anything that's worth having is worth fighting for." (from The Word for You Today devotional)

Be my everything, Lord... when I am tired, be my everything!  When I am relieved, be my everything!  When I am sad, be my everything!  When I am surprised, be my everything!  When I am disappointed, be my everything!  When I am excited, be my everything!  When I am wronged, be my everything!  When I am wrong, be my everything!  When I am full, be my everything!  When I am empty, be my everything!

For 9 days, for 7 days, for 65 days, for all my days... be my EVERYTHING!


Thursday, November 1, 2012

Update from Camp Coq

John sounded a little down when I talked to him yesterday.  He got word that the container was supposed to arrive in Cap Haitien today (11/1) but since today and tomorrow are national holidays the officials in customs will not be working again until Monday.  This means that the container may not be released until Wednesday of next week only leaving him & Sean 2 1/2 days to work on installing the solar components.  (They are supposed to leave Camp Coq Saturday, the 10th to start their trip back home.)


When I talked to him last night he sounded better.  I haven't heard anything today but will keep you posted as I know more.


We know God is in control and that He has the perfect plan, much better than any we could come up with.
I am praying during this time that God will remove any discouragement so that we will not feel defeated but that in the midst of the current trials that we will remain focused on our tasks instead of getting sidetracked and/or disgruntled.  Also praying that we will not be set on seeing only the circumstances of struggle but that we'd experience his perfect peace knowing He's working out the desires of our hearts--for HIS glory.  Please join me in praying that we will continue to seek HIS direction and that we will continue to hear from Him.    

"I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give {us} the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that {we} may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of {our} heart may enlightened in order that {we} may know the hope to which he has called {us}, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his INCOMPARABLY GREAT POWER for us who believe." Ephesians 1:17-19

Thank you for continuing to pray!!!!

We appreciate you!

P.S. I'm not sure how much he is able to get online (if any) while in Camp Coq but feel free to leave him messages here.

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

LOOK, LOOK, LOOK

WOW!!!!!  

I am in tears!!!  

Although I just bragged on Sean Dodds and he went and posted pictures of my new home to the public before I got to see them, I am crying happy tears and I forgive him...  :)

Look at what's been done to the Mission House since July..............





WE HAVE TILE FLOORS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
BEAUTIFUL TILE FLOORS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYYYYYY!!!!




Oh My GOD is so stinkin' amazing!!!!!

Packing, Loading, Traveling... (Part 2)

If you missed Part 1, you can see that here: Packing, Loading, Traveling... (Part 1


Ok, so fast forward 10 days and we were gearing up for John to leave again.  (He and Sean were planning to fly to Haiti today actually but due to Hurricane Sandy their plans changed.)
  
Are you noticing the patterns of change or is it just me?  :)   


flexibility = better chance of sanity or something close to it!


Though I miss John terribly, I'm really grateful that the guys followed their insight (from what I believe was God, himself) and left 3 days early with the intent of reaching Haiti without having any delays due to the storms.  I have heard multiple news reports tonight on the radio about business shut-downs (including airports) where they were scheduled to travel.  God is good!!!

With the change in travel plans, they did arrive in Haiti safe and sound on the 27th.  Yay!!!!!  They stayed 2 nights in Port-au-Prince where they found a familiar place to dine...


Complete with delivery service, ha!


Anyway, they were able to stay at the Mission House (where John and I stayed in June) in P-A-P Saturday and Sunday night.  They shopped for groceries and got a rental car and headed to Camp Coq today.  John was hopeful for a 2-3 hour drive but when he called this afternoon he said -not including the one wrong turn they took- the trip was a little over 5 hours long.  He sounded completely wiped out so extra prayers for them tonight would be great!!!

We are hopeful that our things that left Miami by ship on Thursday, the 25th, will arrive and go through customs with ease in the next couple of days.  We welcome your prayers for that, as well!

If you feel so inclined, PLEASE be in prayer regarding the container of our belongings in general... we are praying that it arrives with 'no issues' and that all of our things are accounted for and undamaged.  Also please pray that the fees that we will have to pay to get the things out of customs will be minimal.  We have heard of others having to pay as much as $10,000 just to get the things that belonged to them out of customs in the recent past.  
Different country... different "rules".  

Over the last couple of weeks I have thought about it all, worried about most of it all, confessed my worry, stressed over every possibility, let go of my stress and picked it back up only to lay it down again and have come to this:  God is in control and He has a plan regardless of what happens in the next few days.  

Do I hope we get everything back that we sent for the least amount of money possible?  Yessiree but if we do not, I know our God has a plan.  My job is to trust Him and let Him handle the rest.  I do better at this 'job' some days than I do on others but tonight I am so tired I am going to rest with "it's all good".

John and Sean are scheduled to be gone for the next 2 weeks.  During that time, they plan to get things ready for our arrival in January.  They will be installing the solar panels, kits and "such things".   !!Please, please excuse my less-than-technical terminologies but my brain is completely fried lately!!!  :/ 

I will try to keep you updated as I get more information.  In the meantime, please continue to pray for us as a family.  It's hard to be separated so much but we know that it's only a matter of weeks before our dream will be unfolding before our very eyes thanks to the One who placed this in our hearts to begin with!  

We have lots of 'hard things' left to do in the following 9 weeks but as we take it one day at a time, we trust all will be as it is supposed to be.  Does that even make sense?  My head hurts trying to put my thoughts into words tonight...ugh...life has been hard lately and it seems that all I can "see" some days are the struggles.  I will, however, choose to cling to what I know and that is that God is EVERYTHING He has promised He will be... He is sufficient and He is faithful!   

I've got to get some sleep but before I close I want to say thank you!  Thank you, God, for being in control when we are anything but!

Thank you to YOU who are faithful to follow us and pray for us and love us, even some from a distance.  We treasure you more than you know!!!!!

Thank you to our family who have (for the most part) been in prayer day in and day out and completely supportive.

Thank you to our closest friends who have rallied around us over the last 9 months and have loved us through some difficult days.  You are family to us, as well!

Thank you to LifeBridge Church who continues to be our cheerleaders and supporters in many ways!

Thank you to so many who are being the hands and feet to our family during this time!  You are blessing us now for sure but your generosity now will continue to bless others for time to come, you have our word on that and HIS (Genesis 12:3)! 

And last but not least, thank you to Sean Dodds!  I am so grateful for him and his family and their love for us and our family and the countless hours they have put into making this journey a reality!!!  I am thrilled that John is not traveling alone this week or working alone or figuring out new things alone!  I am moved by this family's sacrificial giving and dedication to physically walk with us!  

We are Blessed, Indeed!  


"...when you go through deep waters...I will be with you. When you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown.  When you walk through the fire of oppression, you will not be burned up; the flames will not consume you.  For I am the Lord, your God...you are precious to me.  You are honored, and I love you.  Do not be afraid, for I am with you." Isaiah 43:1-5


Monday, October 29, 2012

Packing, Loading, Traveling... (Part 1)

The last few weeks have been a whirlwind but I know you want to know what's been going on so here's a peek at some of the events from 5.on.a.journey in October....




We had to bump up the dates for shipping our furniture so the moving truck was picked up on the 12th and with help from many friends, we were able to get our things loaded that weekend.
"brotherly love"...
After some major emotional roller coasters...








...the truck was packed and the guys were ready to roll!


One more stop to get the car hauler and then they'd be on their way......

John and Joey left Madison on Sunday, the 14th, headed to FL to unload our things, including our Montero Sport, and reload them onto the shipping container that is currently in transit via water.


BUT they couldn't leave town without first making a food run...
...and then they were finally ready to depart!
After a party in the Penske (smiles).....




...they arrived in Miami, FL on Monday and Sean joined them for the reloading fun!  :)
Tuesday morning they unpacked the Penske and loaded the shipping container... 

 Meanwhile back home, we were settling in with air mattresses and a couple of loaner sofas...


**Making sense of the leftovers with no dresser drawers and makeshift window treatments has taken a little getting-used-to but we are making it just fine! ;) **



After a few exhausting days Sean made it home early afternoon on the 17th and a after a couple of flight switch-a-roos, John and Joey made it back home that same evening and all the wives and children said, "AMEN!" :)
True love...


Saturday, October 13, 2012

Keep them coming...

I'm struggling today... down to the last 24 hours of packing/loading... I was super busy yesterday and didn't stop long enough to 'feel'.  We had some super helpers here working hard and we had a wonderful dinner with some of our closest peeps last night... it was an all around good day!

Today, I can't help but feel.  I am sad about what I am having to give up.  Though I stand to gain so much more, I am sad about what I'm losing and what I will lose in the next couple of months, too.  

Man, this is hard!

The piles that I have shifted from one location to the other because I didn't want to have to 'deal' with them are staring me in the face this morning.  I got up at 5am and started packing but by 6am I was back in bed.  The bed we have to load today.

The walls are bare in most rooms and there are half packed boxes in each because when it gets hard, I shift to the next one.  Ugh, I feel so torn...  I have got to get finished!  I know this!!!  Please pray for me today..for all of us today.

Please pray that I can let go of the things I won't need even though some of them represent years of memories!  Letting go is extremely hard and not something I've ever been good at.

Our rabbits left earlier this week headed to their new home.  Sam, our Great Pyrenees,  is not doing well physically.  He didn't get up much at all yesterday and he's usually quite vocal when so many people are going in and out of the house.  Winston, our West Highland Terrier, paces a good bit - knowing things aren't "normal".

I am grieving now but know I that I will be celebrating all of our new adventures soon.

I remain grateful for your prayers...PLEASE keep them coming!

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

4 days

4 days…4days

 Everything we plan to take with us to Haiti has to be packed and loaded by Sunday of this week…… yes…IN…FOUR…DAYS…I woke up at 4:30 this morning with racing thoughts of how I plan/intend/hope to get the rest of it all done in the allotted time. 

I continue to be amazed at how directly God speaks in the midst of our current ‘situations’ through my daily devotionals. 

(smiles)  

This is what mine said today:

            “Trust Me enough to let things happen without striving to predict or control them. Relax, and refresh yourself in the Light of My everlasting Love. My Love-Light never dims, yet you are often unaware of My radiant Presence. When you project yourself into the future, rehearsing what you will do or say, you are seeking to be self-sufficient: to be adequate without My help. This is the subtle sin-so common that it usually slips by unnoticed. 
            The alternative is to live fully in the present, depending on Me each moment. Rather than fearing your inadequacy, rejoice in My abundant supply. Train your mind to seek My help continually, even when you feel competent to handle something by yourself. Don’t divide your life into things you can do by yourself and things that require My help. Instead, learn to rely on Me in every situation. This discipline will enable you to enjoy life more and to face each day confidently."

Psalm 37:3-6, “Trust in the LORD and do good.  Then you will live safely in the land and prosper.  Take delight in the LORD, and He will give you your heart's desires.  Commit everything you do to the LORD.  Trust Him, and He will help you.  He will make your innocence radiate like the dawn, and the justice of your cause will shine like the noonday sun."

Philippians 4:19, "And this same God who God who takes care of me will supply all your needs from his glorious riches, which have been given to us in Christ Jesus."