Tell me again...

"Mamaaaa... I had a nightmare..."
       "What?"
Leaning against my bed as if her strength was failing she said again, "I had a nightmare!" (nevermind the fact that she hadn't even been asleep yet...)  "I had to get up at 58,"  she continued.  "I rolled over and it was 58 o'clock and I didn't know what to do."

She went on and on for a minute and then she said it...
"So, I think I just need to sleep in your bed."

      I resisted the urge to laugh out loud as she gave me the 'please tell me that you are falling for my sad, sob story' look.
I sweetly but precisely denied her request just before she said, "...but I neeeeeed to sleep in your bed...  I need to sleep in the middle."

      "But sweetie, Daddy is already asleep in the middle and you need to go to your bed."

We went back and forth until she could tell that I wasn't giving in and then she said,
"OK, well in this dream, I want you to come tell me goodnight."

      "Go get in the bed and I'll be there in just a minute to tell you goodnight... again..."

"I'm just going to wait for you right here."

      "I can't tuck you in and tell you goodnight if you aren't in the bed, silly...  go get in the bed..."

"But Mama, there's a lizard in my room...
  But Mama, my back hurts...
  But Mama, I want to stay with you... I wanted to stay with you... I wanted to stay with you... please take a deal..."

      "Take a deal?  what does that mean??"

"That means let me in your bed...  my bed is bumpy...  I need just a little bit of water."  As she held her hand up to show me a "little bit" the list went on and on.

      I gave her a sip of my water and off we went...

"I want to give you a hug... will you sqwuush me?
      "No, silly" I said.
"Please, sqwuuuussh me.....!!!"
      I hugged her with a tight squish, she giggled and then I quit.
"Sqwuuuush me again!"
      "No, cause you laugh so loud and you're going to wake everybody up."
"I promise I won't laugh if you will just sqwuuush me again...
 (giggles erupting)

I went back to bed and barely got comfortable before I heard, "Mama, I don't think I feel like going to sleep tonight.  At 5:00 we go to bed...  at 2 we don't...  at 3 we get up...  at 4 we..... so can you tell me goodnight again?  So, you can come in there one more time and tell me goodnight...
Pleeeease, please mama... Can you come right now?

Tucking her in again she said, "Mama, I just don't feel like going to sleep just like Moses didn't feel like going to sleep.  He was a baby and Jesus put him in a basket and"..... dah ta dah ta dah and on and on and on....


As parents, we wear out, right?!?  Somedays I can go a little longer before losing my steam but I. ALWAYS. WEAR. OUT.  I'm so glad that God never does.

In today's Jesus Calling devotional, He reminded me of this, "Dawn, Your awareness of your constant need for Me is your greatest strength."  Sounds kind of backwards, huh?  "Your inadequacy presents you with a continual choice--deep dependence on Me, or despair.  The emptiness you feel within will be filled either with problems or with My Presence.  Make me central in your consciousness by praying continually.  Keep on asking and you will receive, so that your gladness may be full and complete."  (1Thess 5:17, John 16:24)

The truth is I need Him every day, all day and sometimes, I even get up in the night and say, "Tell me again, God.....  tell me again that you are close... tell me again that everything is going to be alright... tell me again that even when I'm squirming, you are hugging me tight... tell me again that what I am looking for is going to happen...  tell me again that it's ok for me to let go...  tell me again that I will never fall beyond your reach... tell me again that the very things you fought for - love, justice, forgiveness, and kindness will win out in the end...  tell me again that I am not reaching for nothing...  tell me again that although we may face disappointments, it is purification...  tell me again that my waiting is not in vain...  Oh God, tell me again...